Perfection: the condition, state, or quality of being free or as free as possible from all flaws or defects. The action or process of improving something until it is faultless or as faultless as possible.
Harmony: Pleasing arrangement of parts; internal calm; interweaving of different accounts into a single narrative.
Self-Expectations: If you value achievement and success you probably push yourself to do well in many ways. This is great because you get things done! However, you may also hold yourself to higher standards and others. You may even have obsessive tendencies and/or have outbursts or breakdowns when things don’t go “right”. This stress can harm our relationships (with ourselves and others) and hinder our ability to enjoy life
Rigid Perfection vs Forgiving/Flexible Harmony: What can we do to make the change?
- Self-Assessment
- What areas do I need perfection?
- What is the worst thing that will happen if my standards are not met?
- What are the consequences of my demands? (positive and negative)
- What could happen if I relax my standards a bit? (positive and negative)
- Plan
- In an area where you cannot lower your standards…
- Communicate with those around you…
- WHY your expectations are so high
- HOW your expectations can be met
- ASK for help and be specific regarding your needs and expectations
- If you find that you can/should relax your standards…
- Remind yourself regularly of your self-assessment and plans to find harmony instead of perfection
- Ask yourself “What is most important?”
- Build in reminders
- Look at peoples’ faces (family/friends/clients/coworkers)
- Re-read client applications or reviews (when issues are work related)
- Step away from the action/regroup
- Communicate with those around you…
- In an area where you cannot lower your standards…
- Reasess as needed