To build resilience, we must consider 6 concepts:
- Perseverance Willingness to endure
- Openness Exploring possibilities beyond our own reality
- Have discussions with people who have ideas different than yours
- Take part in different experiences (attending a church with a friend- going to a country concert with a family member)
- Try new activities (creative exploration.)
- Personal Responsibility The power to transcend our circumstances
- Confidence Certainty about how to achieve a desired outcome
- Emotional Calmness Maintaining a calm state of mind during unexpected or taxing events.
- Realistic Assessment Work through feelings and emotions
Driving force that pushes us through challenges. We all have different levels of this at different times.
Perseverance integrates our body, mind, and spirit.
Body - Physical trials and strength
Mind - Mental challenges and toughness
Spirit - Both (physical and mental) driven from our inner passions.
This is something that needs to be practiced and exercised like a muscle!
To be resilient we must be open to others’ ideas and beliefs. Not necessarily to make them become part of our life, but to understand them. This can cause anxiety and fear because our mind interprets differences as threats in order to protect ourselves.
These things will increase your scope of understanding and give you diverse tools in your toolkit!
When we examine the power that our situations have, we can define our own responsibility for our reactions and take ownership of our experiences.
When we are personally responsible for our circumstances, we will be motivated to find solutions and resolutions to adversity, be accountable for our actions/inactions, and own successes.
Confidence includes the flexibility to resolve challenges and make needed changes. (Openness is key here as well as being flexible may require one to alter his or her reality) Building confidence is building self-trust. This happens over time by successfully working through difficult situations.
This is done by regaining composure as soon after the event as possible.
Assess the situation and reframe the reality we are facing.
Understand the relationship between feelings and emotions.
A feeling is the body’s response of the body to an experience: headache, stomachache, racing heartbeat, lightheadedness
An emotion is a state of mind: anger, depression, happiness, satisfaction, neutrality,
When we are mindful and able to connect the emotion to the feeling and vice versa we can use one to calm the other and regain composure when we understand the situation.
Remember the differences between feelings and emotions and how they relate to each other. Name your feelings; name your emotions; connect the dots to see the way they are linked.
If there is a pattern of having these specific feelings and emotions at the same time, the feelings are most likely a result of the emotion. Once this relationship is understood, a person can use their toolkit to minimize the reactions! (tools may include relaxation techniques, positive imagery, taking medications, etc)
Work with your current environment
It is important to accept the circumstances that surround you in order to make changes. Denying problems or stressors will not help resolve them.
Sources: Angela Duckworth, the founder and CEO of The Character Lab and Bill Guillory, Ph.D. President and CEO Innovations International, Inc.